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iRHollywood
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PostSubject: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Fri Jan 08, 2010 9:49 am

BOTTOM LINE: How does a PUA overcome any(known) strong preference of a woman?Whether its a build/racial/eduacation/political/lifestyle preference

Ok, something I've come across (especially here in the south) is very attractive women with very set racial preferences. This used to irk the crap out of me to now end. In some (rare)cases (during my day game) I've come across racism, but more often than not I can see that it's not all racism, its simply a personal preference. Whether that preference stems from society, peer influence, or whatever it is still a personal preference in a lot of cases.

My first week in Alabama I stopped into a CVS to get a soda, the line was taking forever and I started getting bored. A brunette beauty is in front of me, she drops her phone and I pick it up for her. I hand it back and give a light neg about her having butter fingers, we start flirting. Everything seems great(clear IOIs, responding to kino with more kino, all smiles, etc..), I go for the number close and...

"Oh no hun, you're a colored"

This just completely blew me away. I was so stunned I just put the coke down and left to go think about what happened and how I could've worked the situation in my favor. I was a little pissed at first, mainly with how I basically just ran from the problem and what I intially thought was blatant hate/racism. I later realized that it wasn't really that big of deal. If a very large woman tried to game me I would have said something similar, because I have a "No obese/fat women preference" I'm just not attracted to that, nothing wrong with that. Ok well, I wouldn't say : "Oh no hun, you're fat." but you see the idea.

Anyway, one big thing I've learned since I've gotten into the Pick-up arts is that no matter what a woman says she wants if the right guy walks into her life a lot of preferences can go out the window most of the time.

How does one overcome this? I know next time I'll ignore the comment and try to increase comfort/rapport but I'm not sure thats the right course of action.

I've come across this with several different races of people from los angeles to mobile. I get so tired of all that work just to hear: "I only date/fuck/hang out with latinos/black men/white men/asian etc."


A lot of my friends(after hearing the story) immediately said "wow what a racist bitch", but I disagree. I think the social conditioning (in this particular case) was to blame. She was clearly attracted to me. She had real smiles going(look for the crinkly eyes Laughing), she was enjoying the entire conversation, when I stopped kino she re initiated it. When I handed her my phone for the number close I could clearly see the mental hesitation, the inner battle(between what she wanted and what society says she should/shouldn't want) just played across her face, body language clear as day.


This question really could be applied to more than just racial pref. It could easily be applied to ANY kind of strong preference. So I should re-word my actual question. Its actual really basic, and makes me think I don't know as much about this(pick-up arts) as I thought.

How does a PUA overcome any(known) strong preference of a woman?Whether its build/racial/eduacation/political/lifestyle preference
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Ka
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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Fri Jan 08, 2010 4:46 pm

"We'll i dont normally talk to racist's, but in your case i might make an exception"

First off i have to say man...im just floored that in 2010 this shit can still happen. Im as white as they come, but this kind of thing bothers me so much. You where being a nice, decent guy...her white guy friends are probably busy making moonshine and fucking their cousins.

In anycase man, what you really need to ask yourself when faced with something like that is, "Does this person deserve to be a part of my life?". In this girls case, social conditioning or not, she was plain resist and i would say no. Had she said, "Im sorry i dont date black guys." thats preference (albeit still the definition of racism but at least subtle). You have to decide on a per instance basis when the person is simply conveying preference and when they are being plain ignorant.

When they convey a preference, say "I normally dont date black guys." Then there is a whole slew of things you can say to overcome this;

-"This isnt a normal situation..."
-"Who said anything about dating? Lets start with getting to know each other"
-"Have you ever dated a black guy before?"
         yes* "You cant judge all of us based on one guy, you didnt only date 1 man                            before giving up on us"
         no* "Then you meant you 'never date black guys'...you should give it a chance."
-"I normally dont date (fill in what they are)"

In anycase man, it pains me to know that there are still people in this world that are so ignorant that they think a persons creed determines what kind of a person they are. Some of the most foul, ugly (inside), devious people i have ever known where white. Granted we have all seen the sterotypes from time to time...but judging all people by a select few is plain ignorant.

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Fortunehooks1
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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sat Jan 09, 2010 4:23 am

First off, let's follow a stereotype, it's the south that's how they all function.

Oh me oh my, Hollywood. When this statement is made, as Ka stated, you can either stay along for some moments of verbal volley or just decide that this person should wallow in their own socially induced forever white christmas.

This has happened to me my dude on some occasion, and of course your initial response will be one of anger. The initial anger is something that you must account for and fix pronto. I can assure you that becoming angry doesn't do any good potential futures for you. In my case, I would start to see attractive girls, and already began to solve the personal preference questions for them.

This didn't help me at all. Instead, you have to do what we should be doing in the first place, that's give every girl a fresh clean state. We are strangers, there is some solace in mystery.

To answer your question, there are no surefire ways to alter every girl's reel of reality. What you have to do is go into every social interaction already believing the obvious! Who turns down a chance to own a rainbow?

peace,lvoe and succe SS
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iRHollywood
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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sat Jan 09, 2010 8:35 am

Fortunehooks1 wrote:

What you have to do is go into every social interaction already believing the obvious! Who turns down a chance to own a rainbow?

I must have eaten a bowl of stupid this morning because I have no idea what you mean by this.

I really appreciate the advice Ka, Fortune. It does suck that this still happens, after the fleeting moment of anger and shock I realized "well I could have easily been the best thing in her life, her fucking loss".

I've been in places where a village was literally erased off the earth by pure hate. Every man, woman, child, building and even livestock murdered, raped, pillaged and eventually burned into nothing all because they worship a deity differently. And then to come back to the most badass country on the planet to get rejected like that in 20fucking10, very upsetting at first.

I wanna say this is one of my worst rejections but I've been rejected on things as crazy as musical taste, where I buy my fucking coffee, my political views, etc.. This has always been an issue with me with a small percent of my rejections. Are women telling me this shit to avoid saying "I'm not attracted to you, your game aint working!" or something else?

Example: While sarging in San Fran I was asked by woman I'd been gaming if I'd ever heard of *insert obscure indie band name here*, I answered, no, but they seemed interesting. She just suddenly goes cold on me, conversation kinda comes to a screeching halt. I get impatient, eject, and open another set. Later I'm raking my brain on how I failed the most asinine shit test regarding a stupid fucking band that maybe 30 people know about. Hell, she could have made the band up and I would have never known! So her body language goes closed,I see that excitement in her face dull, she starts looking like how she did before I had approached, REALLY BORED. This really bothered me because like the "no hun you're a colored chick" everything seemed to be going smoothly.


Aside from clear cut racist/ignorant reasons,it just makes absolutely little sense to me to reject someone based on one stupid thing like music preference. It MUST be something else right?

I really need to start carrying a recorder around or something...

I apologize for the minor rant, but I like to learn from all rejections and successes and this particular case makes me think about other rejections similar to this.

I'm doing something wrong and I intend to fix it afuckinsap.
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Ka
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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sat Jan 09, 2010 4:49 pm

I think this is your problem...baring the plain racist stuff....you give up too easy. Girls are conditioned to say no even when they want to say yes. They will use, as youve seen, practically any excuse to try and dissuade us. What you need to do is learn to separate the plausible excuses and the bullshit.

 When youre given a bullshit excuse you just blow through it and keep going.

-i have a b/f...
"We just met and already your sharing your problems with me?"
"O thats cool im not into guys"
Best b/f destroyer ive ever seen...
http://puas.open-board.com/the-pua-beat-f27/wow-t3483.htm

-have you heard of x band
"No, but tell me about them i love all kinds of music"
"I havent, tell me about them maybe ill look them up later"

-O you get your coffee at x,y,z
"Yea what are we gonna do like a coffee house westside story now?"

-political views
"Lets just agree that we wont ever agree on our political views." (interesting story, i gamed a chick once who had oppossing views on the subject, and she had 3-4 friends sharing those views used this worked like gold...im off in the corner with her while all the other dudes are arguing...my cousin goes "See Ka is smart, instead of argueing hes with the only girl here")
**Also, pretty good idea not to get wrapped up in political or religious debate...if you see it going that way defuse the situation...it will only lead to arguement and will but you in a place without control**

My point is there is something you can say given every dumb excuse...and in the rare occasion there isnt, or it not worth overcoming you can simply excuse yourself and move on. Its not your fualt and you didnt do anything wrong, sometimes people arent ready for change. If they really oppose you that much despite your best effort to give them the opportunity to meet and know you...their lose.

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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sun Jan 10, 2010 2:01 am

Fortune means you're the prize, lol.

Don't worry about the rants . . . your safe here.

I don't know if this will help you or not . . . something I wrote a while back:
Whether it's fair or not, girls will use things like your age, race, color, style, social status, etc., for automatic disqualification. Some of these things you can change, some you can't. Some girls will just use this reason as an excuse while others are possibly afraid to date or hook up with someone in that particular "class" or "status". Still other girls are plain stuck up and snobby about it.

What to do about this, or is there anything you can do about it?

Yes, actually. Now, obviously you can't win EVERY girl over, but if you appeal to her attraction switches first and also appeal to her sense of curiosity you can push her boundaries. Build her curiosity up about your particular thing that she avoids. Build her excitement about it at the same time.

For instance, whether you're the bad boy type, the preppy type, or whatever kind of guy you are, if you are first and foremost cool and confident about yourself that will catch her attention, regardless. This is where we go back to inner game. But this is also one of the first things the girl will notice, other than whether you have style or not, lol.

You can be too tall, too short, too skinny, too fat. You can be too old or too young. You can drive the wrong car or truck, not wear the right clothes, your skin could be the wrong color, your hair could be the wrong color, your eyes could be the wrong color, you could be too muscular or not muscular enough. Are you getting the picture? Some of these things you can change, and some of these things you can't change. Some things take a lot of time and effort to change, and some take a lot of money or credit to change.

Then again, you can't fit what every girl wants anyway. And you wouldn't want to fit what every girl wants, either.

All of the excuses above are just that . . . excuses. Some girls will literally look for any reason for it not to work out between you two. However, you can offer her a very compelling argument, if in fact you want to, by being so interesting to her that she can't get enough of you. You make her laugh, you keep her attention, you push her away verbally (the physical push in this situation wouldn't work quite as well) when she throws and excuse listed above at you. You place her immediately in the friend zone before she can lay that on you. You flip the frame, in essence, that you see coming.

Now, again, this won't work with ALL girls, but it will turn the tide on many of them.

There are countless girls that pigeon holed a guy right off the bat that ended up falling for that same guy who wasn't even her type and she wanted nothing to do with him in that way.

Alright, so you start with being cool and confident, then you throw in a dash of making her laugh and keeping her attention and interest. What does this lead to?

Basically, it should lead to you being the one guy that changes her mind about whatever stereotype she is clinging to in her mind. Remember, this IS something that is just in her mind. Just as your inner game needs to be tight, hers in this case is also tight, so you have to overcome her already strong mindset to break her impression of the stereotype. That's where you need to change things, by changing her mind.

Through the process of you being with her, spending time with her, building her attraction toward you, building her comfort with you, you are at the same time opening her eyes to the truth about the stereotype she is holding onto in her mind. Now, some girls will shatter their stereotypes easily, while other girls will be very tough, and still others will hang on to them for dear life. Again, you can't win over EVERY girl, and really you don't want to. Not every girl is worth messing with, just like not every guy is worth messing with.

But, if you think the girl has enough merit to break the stereotype in her mind, here's a process for you to achieve that.

Next week's newsletter you don't want to miss. We have, as a special treat, one of THE BIGGEST names in this community giving us a gift. We've received a nice piece that will be the newsletter.

If you have questions you want me to directly answer, or have a success story you'd like to share, contact me directly at latripp2818@gmail.com

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Welcome to the new you.



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Ka
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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sun Jan 10, 2010 6:09 pm

-Too young/too old
"O, so your one of those types that judges people by a number"
too young only
"O so your one of those types that judges maturity by a number"
(my brother used this in nashville when he was 19 and the chick was 30ish. She kept making comments about his age and he used this line a few times, then he even flipped it around and started making fun of her for being old...completely neutralized her comments)

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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sun Jan 17, 2010 1:40 am

Hollywood: whoa; that really was a straight up bigot remark and whether she likes blacks or not, people know better than to say things like that.

Infact, she said it kind of like you should have known better, as-if you were hired help or way below her.

Things like this make me wonder about the south.

Well done though, it would have taken every nerve in my body NOT to react.
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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sun Jan 17, 2010 1:57 am

Seven, Ka gave great advice on how to NOT let this actually affect you.

Sure, the girl was way out of bounds. This is true. But how WE handle OURSELVES in those situations is what matters.

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AFC: "Would you mind coming here please, if it's not too much trouble?"

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Make her qualify herself to YOU.

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PostSubject: Re: Gaming against strong racial prefereces   Sun Jan 17, 2010 3:01 am

Yeah that was really harsh but I don't think that necessarily makes her a racist, she could have been looking for an excuss to reject you than you couldn't argue with.

Maybe she is racist.

Maybe she just doesn't find black guys attractive.

Maybe her family or friends wouldn't approve.

Maybe you hadn't built up enough attraction and she wanted a rejection you couldn't argue with.

If it was the one of the first two you'd wouldn't want anything to do with her anyway but if it was either of the second 2 options you could have done something about it.
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