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 Writing on the wall?

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LaRockStar
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PostSubject: Writing on the wall?   Sat Jan 09, 2010 1:47 am

Is this a valid reason to get upset...

Background: GF & her bestfriend going out of town (5 hrs away) for a marathon event. I told her yesterday I'd like to see her before she leaves...even if it's just for a few days. She goes "Sure - I'll see what time I get off work. I'll let you know either way.."

Today comes...nothing...we text but nothing mentioning meeting or leaving. I get on her friends FaceBook and read her status.

..."on the road..."

I'm pretty pissed... irate almost. The fact she didnt even text me saying she COULDN'T make it...

Granted... I'm highly emotional when it comes to girls (good/bad) so maybe I'm over reacting...
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Fortunehooks1
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PostSubject: Re: Writing on the wall?   Sat Jan 09, 2010 5:04 am

Larock, if you have to go on her friend's facebook page just ease your insecure heart and mind, Im just saying. Now, granted she didn't follow through on what you two agreed upon.

To compound that she posts on facebook and justs leaves without a word. You shouldn't be so irate and upset my friend. It won't help in this situation. The best thing to do jokingly make light of this situation. Meaning, make her aware of the follie, and how for some interesting reason it bothered you at first, but then you put yourself in those shoes, and bam mab bam, it's a whatever to you.

If you come just boyfriend samaurai sword slinging and yelling and screaming. She's gonna hightail it so fast out of your life my friend. You must play this close to the vest and ask yourself. What would a person who had the power to sell the world respond? peace,lvoe and succe SS
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Ka
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PostSubject: Re: Writing on the wall?   Sat Jan 09, 2010 4:57 pm

My guess, and obviously im not there to know for sure, is that your probably suffocating her and she needs some space and "me time".

Ease up, as i said before shes either gonna be the girlfriend you expect or shes not. If she cross's the boundary of what you find acceptable that is the time to pick the fight...its not time to pick the fight when she doesnt stroke your ego so you can have a little validation.

You know that im here to support you, and nothing i say is meant to be hurtful....with that said man you seriously need to go back and re-read all the posts from the last couple months were the guys have given you solid advice. After that you need to heed that advice and start to develop. As the saying goes the definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. You continue to act the same, thus your yielding the same results...stop and work on changing that so you can enjoy what you have. I assume thats why your here, to help your growth and development. The only thing stopping you is you.

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L.A. Tripp
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PostSubject: Re: Writing on the wall?   Sun Jan 10, 2010 2:09 am

In THIS particular situation, I must say SHE was fucking straight up wrong. For her to blatantly tell him she didn't have time to tell him good bye . . . yet had time to sit with her g/f and take pics of them leaving and load them onto FB . . .

Yeah, you could say he was smothering her so she did that. However, she also ignored him Monday night (regardless of what she says Larock), among other things.

Now, I've run this scenario by 3 other women. Every one agrees that with the two being in a relationship, and for her to leave for 2 days w/o saying bye . . . none of them agree with that. In fact, they've all said . . . DUMP her.

She is BLATANTLY showing she does NOT value you, bro. She's expecting you to be waiting like a puppy for when she returns, everything just being peaches and cream. She KNOWS you're sitting there on pins and needles awaiting her return . . . while she's off having a blast.

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LaRockStar
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PostSubject: Re: Writing on the wall?   Sun Jan 10, 2010 7:17 am

First off I can't thank you guys enough for listening to me pretty much rant about the same stuff over and over again.

As I continue to know what changes I have to make - its actually making them that is the difficult part.

this ALL stems from the inner game stuff. The external validation should NOT ruin or make my day.

When Tripp's wing said I was attractive and cute in a text the other day... it totally made my night. Granted it should have made me smile - but not totally lift up my spirits.

I'm going to pull back some - re-evaluate the relationship and more importantly myself. I thought that having a label would cure some of these issues and it hasn't...exactly what you guys have said all along.

I'm so concerned about trying to micromanage the situation I'm losing sight of the happy moments... the "in the present and now" moments. I can't control what she does or how she thinks. If it doesn't work. It doesn't work. I'm a good guy and I can find somebody who I deserve... not the other way around...

I must keep telling my self that when I have this horrific thought processes..

and Hooks... that quote was beautiful my friend.

"f you come just boyfriend samaurai sword slinging and yelling and
screaming. She's gonna hightail it so fast out of your life my friend."
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Ka
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PostSubject: Re: Writing on the wall?   Sun Jan 10, 2010 6:03 pm

http://puas.open-board.com/the-pua-beat-f27/the-3steps-2-types-of-people-theory-thread-t1983.htm

This may help you jump start things, particularly the 3 steps part, an old post of mine.

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LaRockStar
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PostSubject: Re: Writing on the wall?   Wed Jan 13, 2010 6:48 am

Excellent suggestion KA. I've been reading it repeatedly for the past few days...
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