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BigSeanSDB
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PostSubject: I Hate Being A Pussy   Tue Feb 02, 2010 7:45 am

I had a pretty shitty night. I met up with a girl off of POF.com. After I got her number, and made a few phone calls here and there, we finally met up. Now, this wasn't a date. It was just meet up to see if things will go any further and if there were any sparks. We agreed to meet around 8ish. She had me waiting til' 8:50. I was ready to leave until she text to let me know she just arrived.

She was talking to someone on her phone and swayed in like it wasn't a big deal. This is where I'm confused. I hold my ground and told her that it was rude for her to make me wait that long and eventually after her excuses that it wasn't a date or anything, she apologized. Unfortunately, it went down hill from there. There was somewhat good conversation going on but she kept on pounding me with IODs after IOD after IOD. She spent most of her time staring at a basketball game, I try to initiate something fun such as slaps which she ignored. She even told me straight that she just doesn't want to date me or whatever.

She even had dinner already so all she had was water. I decide to cut it short and grab a doggy bag. I wish I just walked out right there and than and stick with the check. At this point, I gave up and didn't try to really hold conversation with her anymore. As we were walking out, I decided to ask this question which was very AFCish but at this point, I literally had nothing else to lose. I asked her, "Why did she even wanted to come out and see me?"

She replied that she thought I was a nice guy and she enjoyed talking to me. I feel soo pissed off right now like I wasted soo much time. I'm tired of girls throwing me in the friend zone and referring to me as...."nice".

Mistakes
-She texted me offer to come meet up with her and her friends but I had to decline because I didn't come off too desperate and already had other plans.
-I was using WAY too much cocky funny through texting alone which ended up making me coming off as arrogant and ego problem. She even mentioned to me, "She couldn't wait to break my ego".
-I waited too long to actually initiate a meet up. Originally, I asked her to go shopping with me which I flaked because I couldn't make and didn't message her that it was cancelled. But she told me to call her to make sure so technically it was like she was ready to flake out on me

So I probably had this coming or whatever. It just amazes me how cold hearted women can be if a guy isn't alpha. I wanted to vent but I just wanted to know, why would she even meet up with me if she wasn't interested in dating in the first place??
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Tue Feb 02, 2010 10:41 am

She met up with you to boost her ego. Maybe part of her was interested but it's hard for me to tell.

It's no wonder im a misogynist Wink - just kidding

First off, dinner was a bad idea. Atleast as far as first dates or meets or whatever goes.

Second, I don't mind flaking, and you shouldn't either. It let's them know you're in demand; I was so late for a date with that one girl in my journal that she ended up leaving. The next time I saw her (first meet), I got my cock sucked by her.

Also, next time a girl is late - just reframe it, "How cute, you came late so I couldn't tell how excited you were to meet up with me".

Definitely limit the c&f tho, replace it with funny sincerity.

And honestly man, people are gonna disagree with me here - but looks mean ALOT. There is shit you can and can't get away with if a girl is naturally attracted to your swagger.

You need confidence but you'll NEVER have confidence if you can't be comfortable in your own skin.

This starts with good grooming habits, good eating habits and making sure that you look GREAT whenever you go out.

I weigh about 208lbs. right now but I have a muscular athletic build (which can ONLY be achieved through diet & exercise) so I wear form fitting jeans, shirts and jackets.

Sean - that IS where you want to be. You want to scream sexuality, baggy clothes are not in, and if someones fat they try to cover this up with baggy clothing.

I once read that if a person can't see your body underneath your clothing, you generally look sloppy and I agree with this 100%.

Knowing you, I think where you need to be is starting with you. Forget the girls, they'll come man.

Get your diet in order. Lean meats, veggies and nuts.

I just started fasting 2 days a week until dinner time, let's just say that the results have been amazing thus far.

Also work out on an empty stomach. If you're worried about having energy then take a caffeine shot prior to working out. Don't eat anything for atleast an hour after working out.

You do all this and I promise you, you'll be a sexual beast.

When you're feeling good about yourself, then get your clothing in order.

Two african americans to copy & follow as far as style goes is:



Usher and,


Chris Brown

(Let's face it, skinny guys look better in clothing,; and it's no wonder they're more likely to get women)

When you look good and feel good, half the battle is over - women migh aswell take their panties off FOR you.

Seven
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Fri Feb 05, 2010 9:27 am

So everyone knows, Se7en is banned for life. As well as GreenPUA. They were one and the same person. Thanks to this child the entire forum was wiped out today. A child in a supposed man's body.

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Alpha: "Come here, now."
AFC: "Would you mind coming here please, if it's not too much trouble?"

You have one shot, and it's in the first 3 seconds.
Make her qualify herself to YOU.

Don't back down from the girl. CHALLENGE her!
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BigSeanSDB
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Fri Feb 05, 2010 12:02 pm

That pisses me off! I mean I had a lot of great information I could back to reread and learn from. I read about why you banned Se7en. As much as his skills seem to be, the fact that he deleted the posts in my forum is so unacceptable!
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Fri Feb 05, 2010 12:08 pm

Exactly bro. He is NOT what or who you want to follow. This was an extremely childish act because he could not stand me, period. It pisses me off too that what was put up here by you, me, and HOTWHEELS, among others, are gone.

I wish we could have avoided this. But, the only way would have been for me to bring the hammer down on Seven before, which I wanted badly to do . . . and should have.

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Alpha: "Come here, now."
AFC: "Would you mind coming here please, if it's not too much trouble?"

You have one shot, and it's in the first 3 seconds.
Make her qualify herself to YOU.

Don't back down from the girl. CHALLENGE her!
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L.A. Tripp
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Fri Feb 05, 2010 12:42 pm

Sean, give me and HOTWHEELS a bit and we'll work on replacing what WE had on here, the tips, for you. K bro? Hope that helps some.

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Alpha: "Come here, now."
AFC: "Would you mind coming here please, if it's not too much trouble?"

You have one shot, and it's in the first 3 seconds.
Make her qualify herself to YOU.

Don't back down from the girl. CHALLENGE her!
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BigSeanSDB
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Fri Feb 05, 2010 10:06 pm

Thanks man I really appreciate it! I mean I remember most of the important facts that I got from every one:

-Before I can change myself, I have to change my mindset
-Push my comfort zone and always escalate in any and every escalation.
-Nothing is wrong with apologizing and sharing feeling in the early stages as long as you don't overdo it.
-A lot of girls are into big black guys
-HOTWHEELS said I wasn't bad looking(haha...when attractive women compliment me on my looks, I always consider that a good thing!)
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Sat Feb 06, 2010 2:56 am

I have to add this:

If you go on a diet, start getting in shape do it for yourself, not to get girls.

If you want to do these things still I'd be happy to give you some more tips.
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Sat Feb 06, 2010 3:22 am

RockandRollah thanks for that! Yeah, you're posts were lost too, damn.

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Alpha: "Come here, now."
AFC: "Would you mind coming here please, if it's not too much trouble?"

You have one shot, and it's in the first 3 seconds.
Make her qualify herself to YOU.

Don't back down from the girl. CHALLENGE her!
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RockandRollah
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Sat Feb 06, 2010 5:38 am

Well he sure knew how to make sure those bridges were burned damn well.
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Sun Feb 07, 2010 6:40 am

RockandRollah wrote:
I have to add this:

If you go on a diet, start getting in shape do it for yourself, not to get girls.

If you want to do these things still I'd be happy to give you some more tips.

Understand. Trust me I had to learn this the hard way! There was this one girl, named Missy who was my first HB10 crush! We met at summer school but after certain events, I came off as a creeper and she didn't want anything to do with me Fast forward to next summer, my friend swears up and down that he goes to school with her now and she wanted to hook up with me. The only thing is, she would only date me if I lost some weight.

So I spent a good chunk of the summer spending 30min a day on taebo, walking around my neighborhood 3x a day and eating healthier. By the end of the summer, I was losing some weight and it showed! I felt so proud of myself! Unfortunately, my friend admitted that he lied to me just so he could help me lose the weight. The thing with him is that he's always lying to me but he went too far that time! I broke my friendship with him and we haven't spoken since. To make matters worse, I gained all the weight back.

So trust me, I understand the importance of losing weight for yourself. I really do want to. I've spoken with a doctor over at my school, and he told me that if I don't take better care of myself health wise, that I won't be able to work and be in REAL trouble by the time I reach my 30s and 40s! So I'm up for it! I've been spending an hour working out 3x a week with tae bo boot camp. Been working better on eating healthier with less proportions than I usually get. But when I'm sitting in front of good food, its easier said than done. Any tips or advice you can provide will be helpful.
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Sun Feb 07, 2010 8:05 pm

Quote :
So trust me, I understand the importance of losing weight for yourself. I really do want to. I've spoken with a doctor over at my school, and he told me that if I don't take better care of myself health wise, that I won't be able to work and be in REAL trouble by the time I reach my 30s and 40s! So I'm up for it! I've been spending an hour working out 3x a week with tae bo boot camp. Been working better on eating healthier with less proportions than I usually get. But when I'm sitting in front of good food, its easier said than done. Any tips or advice you can provide will be helpful.

Being a larger guy myself, I understand what you're going through especially with the having a hard time resisting good food. That's why you need one day of the week to splurge (but not too much) it takes less self control to go 6 days without cake, soda etc than months and months on end. And tje latter leads to binging as I'm sure you may know from experiance, I sure do!

I don't know how busy your schedule is but try to make more time for cardio. You can do that 6 days a week. Take a rest day (from all unneeded exertion) every week it can be the same as your diet cheat day but it doesn't have to be. (When I was doing this it, they were both on Sundays.) If you get in to lifting weights do so 3 days a week, working a different set or two of muscles a day. Try to make them related if possible (one day do chest, shoulders and back together for example) Try to do abs every day that you work out but remember if you over do it and build up the abdominal muscles too much your belly will actually stick out more, the important thing is to burn the fat off the middle. Working the lower back is also important in getting the abs nice and tight.

Get a motivated partner who will push you, but remember it's not a competition. Slow controlled reps are more helpful than big showy look how much weight I can throw around reps. You are not there to impress the fellows or even the ladies, and of course you know there are better ways to impress them there anyway.
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Fri Feb 12, 2010 2:14 am

BigSeanSDB wrote:
I had a pretty shitty night. I met up with a girl off of POF.com. After I got her number, and made a few phone calls here and there, we finally met up. Now, this wasn't a date. It was just meet up to see if things will go any further and if there were any sparks. We agreed to meet around 8ish. She had me waiting til' 8:50. I was ready to leave until she text to let me know she just arrived.
Ok, if I remember correctly, I believe I told you that you shouldn't have even waited this long for the girl. This was extremely rude on her part to begin with. As Ka had suggested, you should have opened other sets while there and been social when she got there. Otherwise, as I'm saying you shouldn't have even still been there. Since you were still there, and she arrived while on the phone, you should have said, WHILE she was on the phone, "I see you're busy, call me when you're serious about meeting with me" and WALKED AWAY, but with a smile on your face.
Quote :

She was talking to someone on her phone and swayed in like it wasn't a big deal. This is where I'm confused. I hold my ground and told her that it was rude for her to make me wait that long and eventually after her excuses that it wasn't a date or anything, she apologized. Unfortunately, it went down hill from there. There was somewhat good conversation going on but she kept on pounding me with IODs after IOD after IOD. She spent most of her time staring at a basketball game, I try to initiate something fun such as slaps which she ignored. She even told me straight that she just doesn't want to date me or whatever.

She even had dinner already so all she had was water. I decide to cut it short and grab a doggy bag. I wish I just walked out right there and than and stick with the check. At this point, I gave up and didn't try to really hold conversation with her anymore. As we were walking out, I decided to ask this question which was very AFCish but at this point, I literally had nothing else to lose. I asked her, "Why did she even wanted to come out and see me?"

She replied that she thought I was a nice guy and she enjoyed talking to me. I feel soo pissed off right now like I wasted soo much time. I'm tired of girls throwing me in the friend zone and referring to me as...."nice".
The whole LJBF zone is avoided by escalation. Verbal and physical.
Quote :

Mistakes
-She texted me offer to come meet up with her and her friends but I had to decline because I didn't come off too desperate and already had other plans.
-I was using WAY too much cocky funny through texting alone which ended up making me coming off as arrogant and ego problem. She even mentioned to me, "She couldn't wait to break my ego".
-I waited too long to actually initiate a meet up. Originally, I asked her to go shopping with me which I flaked because I couldn't make and didn't message her that it was cancelled. But she told me to call her to make sure so technically it was like she was ready to flake out on me

So I probably had this coming or whatever. It just amazes me how cold hearted women can be if a guy isn't alpha. I wanted to vent but I just wanted to know, why would she even meet up with me if she wasn't interested in dating in the first place??
Ok, you're not desperate just because you agree to meet up.
Yep, too much C&F can come across as arrogant which is not good.
Just because she asks you to call her doesn't mean she's planning to flake on you.

Sorry it has taken me this long, bro.

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Alpha: "Come here, now."
AFC: "Would you mind coming here please, if it's not too much trouble?"

You have one shot, and it's in the first 3 seconds.
Make her qualify herself to YOU.

Don't back down from the girl. CHALLENGE her!
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Sun Feb 14, 2010 4:32 am

Thanks Trippp! Appreciate it,bro! Yeah I wish I just walked off when she was on her cell and just walked in the restaurant without saying hello or whatever. So disrespectful! My only question I have left is, during the interaction, should I have done something different and took the fact that she said she didn't want to go out with me a shit test? Just pretty much not acknowledge that and kept on going? I'm asking for future refrence if I'm in a meeting/date with a girl and she's giving
e the cold shoulder or has her bitch shield up.
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Tue Feb 16, 2010 7:33 am

I just walked in on this one. I read allusions to this above, but not the direct point. So, here is how I understand her treatment of you. She walked all over you that night because you established that behavior as acceptable.

It sounds like she was a wasted effort from the time she showed up, so probably next to nothing you could have done would have really turned the situation around. I'm not saying it's impossible, but in any case it probably wasn't worth the effort. What she did was rapidly test her boundaries of what she could get away with (in effect, how much respect should she have for you). By letting her show up so late, by letting her get away with talking on the phone, etc., etc., you showed her that the boundaries were almost endless and that she didn't really need to show you any respect. And in case you didn't realize it, she was probably late because she was eating with another guy.

Don't take this too harshly-- I'm only recognizing these things because I've been there. Join the vault and read some of my absurd stories... I know what it feels like to be prodded like that, and the weak, humiliating feeling that follows it. It's okay Wink

I'm also guessing that your reaction and recovery were less than perfect. Did you maybe let real irritation show, and then fail to get over it quickly? That would only vindicate the girl's decision to be a bitch in the first place. It's okay to be... playfully pissed. But if you're actually so upset that it shows, then you probably just need to get up and walk away.

Lessons learned: 1) set boundaries. if she shows up an hour late, she'll find an empty table. If she comes to dinner and orders only water, she'll sit through a six course meal of yours, getting no pickings, and waiting for hours while you savor every single bite. 2) establish some sort of expectations beforehand (but not rigid). In other words, in case you didn't do this last time, be sure she knows and you know it's a dinner. Likewise, if you're meeting at a bar, make sure you both know it's not a dinner. And 3) you're not helping your chances if you suffer through an awful evening. If you're compelled to get up and leave, do it.
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PostSubject: Re: I Hate Being A Pussy   Sun Feb 28, 2010 12:14 am

Planning, being kept waiting, etc..
It's like a giant chessboard or strategy game. Meet these requirements in the placement of the pieces.

-If she doesn't show up, you're still having fun [even better if she's aware, but don't throw it out there all intentional like. People aren't stupid and can smell bullshit and agenda's a mile away. If you've talked before and mentioned that you're interested in photography and art and you've invited her to come check out an art gallery with you and she's not there YOU are still having fun checking out the art gallery, she knows this. If you tell her to meet you at a coffee shop, and she's late and you tell her that you're having fun, it smells like an agenda.].

-If for some reason the placement is somewhere where you'll be kept waiting [which I would suggest only after you know she'll show] and she doesn't show up on time fuck her. A stupid bitch that's going to keep you waiting isn't worth your time. Imagine anytime you've shown up really late and someone you were supposed to meet wasn't there. Later you text asking where they are. How'd you feel about that? And them? Most likely like an ass or that you've fucked up. You told her she fucked up by being late but you did NOT show her she fucked up. You can bitch about her being late all you want, but YOU WERE STILL THERE WAITING.

Girls are well aware of PU and PUA's. They know about AFC's and AFC's trying to be PUA's. They get an ego boost stomping out a PUA wannabe. A lot of girls think all PU is a bunch of tricks and lies used to sex them. This means it's become even MORE difficult to get girls if you're doing something that's obviously a PUA thing. How easy is it for you to get a hold of material from a certain Mr.DeAngelo? Is being cocky and funny really doubling your dates? Or is it poorly executed and making you look like a fake?

To be cocky, as you said you were, you need to build a mentality for it. Personally I find most of what girls say to be complete horseshit because I've gone through years and years of frustration hearing a girl say some lame ass excuse for why she doesn't like me, or can't talk, etc. etc.. Then when I learned more I started to notice that it wasn't the reason. I've heard all sorts of rejections. I've heard all sorts of horseshit.

I am not a fan of horseshit, lies, fake bitches, pettiness, superficial attitudes, etc.. So, when someone dishes that nonsense out to me, I don't take her seriously, and thus I make fun of her. I say something that amuses ME. Usually sarcastic as hell, but fun. So, I actually AM cocky and funny. I don't think she's worth my time until she proves she gives a damn about other people.


You appear [from an outsider's view] that you were really into this chick. Were just being cocky and funny so she'd like you.
Why do you like her?
What quality's [non physical] does she have that you're interested in?
What's something concrete you can say about her that makes her stand out amongst other girls?

I'm asking because I used to lull myself into thinking that I really liked said girl, only to find out I don't actually know said girl. I just know she's hot, gives off the impression she cares about people and enjoys some activity I find attractive. Other than that, there wasn't much going on. But, once I started talking to lots and lots of chicks I started noticing a lot of them are very very boring [just how a lot of guys are very very boring] and don't do much of anything. So, I get to know them and see if there's something I like about them. Then I go for it.
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